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From: Vniversum
Date: 04 May 2003
Time: 04:17:00 -0400
Remote Name: 68.113.35.156
Nick, I would like to help but it is so difficult to answer a question like this one without sounding like some insipid piece of regurgitated Hallmark wisdom. But what the hey, heres my opinion. In loving someone we are forced to look closely at ourselves, perhaps closer than we wish to look, for that is ultimately what we will see in them, our mirror, our issues, our idiosyncrasies. There is no doubt that loving requires courage, one must be prepared for the startling things one is opt to encounter, in loving another. Relationships, once the euphoria of newness and romantic vertigo wears off, have a tendency to trudge up our skeletons, our insecurities, our fears and our frail humanity (which is a scary thing in itself, frankly) forcing us, in a way, to deal with them. It takes strength to love someone, strength and courage, because you must be willing to work at it, to fight for it, to nurture it, (Im aware this is sounding banal) when perhaps you dont feel like it. Love requires that we be both self-reflective and selfless, which is exhausting; it is so much easier to live with the toilet seat up, or ones pantyhose draped across the lampshade, an icebox full of instant dinners (single serving), and perhaps some African violets for companionship, but doesnt the easy path often lead to stagnation? That is what I have always thought; though I do love my house plants dearly and often sing to them soothingly (its been perfectly acceptable to do this ever since Prince Charles confessed that he converses with his vegetables to help them grow plumper). So I guess, after a long winded diatribe of little clarity or uniqueness, my answer is that love requires courage because love entails growth, and growth is very seldom easy.