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From:
Date: 03 Nov 2003
Time: 18:43:21 -0600
Remote Name: 216.192.39.2
Spiny ~ Sense of humor is one of my top three, along with intelligence and a good heart. It sounds like you are experiencing waves of change and learning how to keep your head above water while treading the opportunities of facing your own shadow and those around you. I think we imagine that harmony in the perfect relationship is like a still and tranquil pond, clearly reflecting the sky above and the teeming life below the surface. And then life comes along and starts tossing stones in and skipping them across the surface and the resulting waves start churning up everything.. . . . . . . Why is growing up so much about going back into your past and healing all the wounds, the slights, the hot buttons of things held over for resolution? It is tough to get honest about the fact that many times what is going on is mostly about the past, and has little to do with the present. Kind of like when your SO pulls the bell rope in an old mansion, and what really is happening is that it is ringing a bell somewhere deep in the depths of your early life. And it is hard sometimes to trace the lines while someone right in front to you is yanking furiously on the rope, trying to get your attention . . . usually off of pulling on their bell rope. . . . . . . . Hope is an interesting word. I always think of it as trying to keep something as a possibility, like keeping a door open. Yet, I always wonder if it is too passive - like holding the door propped open but not being willing to step into the room and get to work tipping the scales from possibility to probability to certainty. Is hope what we do when we do not know what action to take? Or is it the right action of stillness and openness, letting the universe weave its magic for the best of us all? . . . . . . . . . I saw an interesting show last night for the first time (on TLC I think) that echoes a bit of what you expressed. Two back to back episodes of (. . . wait for it . . .) "Date Patrol". Yet, when you get beyond the title, what you see in each hour long episode is a person who is struggling a bit in their life and all of the problems are showing up in this one area. Some honest feedback, some expert help in understanding what the problems are and developing some skills, and they start to blossom from the inside. Talk about magic wands, does it get any better than that? Hope that you can use your flounder as the Native Americans did when planting corn and use it as fertilizer to make your life grow and blossom.